1. Wear your glasses.
2. Make sure your partner is actually in bed.
3. Set timer for 3 minutes, in case you doze off in the middle.
4. Set the mood with lighting. (Turn them ALL OFF!)
5. Make sure you put 911 on your speed dial before you begin.
6. Write partner's name on your hand in case you can't remember.
7.Keep the polygrip close by so your teeth don't end up under the bed.
8. Have Tylenol ready in case you actually complete the act.
9. Make all the noise you want. The neighbors are deaf too.
10. If it works, call everyone you know with the good news.
11.Don't even think about trying it twice.
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 |  | konifur
Posted on Jan 21, 2009 at 12:46 AM
26,616 tokens, 1.6 months wasted |
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DO NOT... use a sex swing unless other people are there to help you get out of it .
(This comment was modified on Jan 21, 2009 12:48 AM)
forgive me i am discombobulated again.
i would not like be a member of a club who would have me as a member...Groucho
Marks.
T.U.R.D. (because I'm a farter)