Why Did The Chicken Cross The Road? - uGoto.com
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Why Did The Chicken Cross The Road?
7 comments | Posted by Bamber 14 months ago
Passing The Baton
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Why did the chicken cross the road? We asked a variety of people about this:

BARACK OBAMA: The chicken crossed the road because it was time for a change! The chicken wanted change!

JOHN McCAIN: My friends, that chicken crossed the road because he recognized the need to engage in cooperation and dialogue with all the chickens on the other side of the road.

HILLARY CLINTON: When I was First Lady, I personally helped that little chicken to cross the road. This experience makes me uniquely qualified to ensure right from Day One that every chicken in this country gets the chance it deserves to cross the road. But then, this really isn't about me.

GEORGE W. BUSH: We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road, or not. The chicken is either against us, or for us. There is no middle ground here.

DICK CHENEY: Where's my gun?

COLIN POWELL: Now to the left of the screen, you can clearly see the satellite image of the chicken crossing the road.

BILL CLINTON: I did not cross the road with that chicken. What is your definition of chicken?

AL GORE: I invented the chicken.

JOHN KERRY: Although I voted to let the chicken cross the road, I am now against it! It was the wrong road to cross, and I was misled about the chicken's intentions. I am not for it now, and will remain against it.

AL SHARPTON: Why are all the chickens white? We need some black chickens.

DR. PHIL: The problem we have here is that this chicken won't realize that he must first deal with the problem on this side of the road before it goes after the problem on the other side of the road. What we need to do is help him realize how stupid he's acting by not taking on his current problems before adding new problems.

OPRAH: Well, I understand that the chicken is having problems, which is why he wants to cross this road so bad. So instead of having the chicken learn from his mistakes and take falls, which is a part of life, I'm going to give this chicken a car so that he can just drive across the road and not live his life like the rest of the chickens.

ANDERSON COOPER, CNN: We have reason to believe there is a chicken, but we have not yet been allowed to have access to the other side of the road.

NANCY GRACE: That chicken crossed the road because he's guilty! You can see it in his eyes and the way he walks.

PAT BUCHANAN: To steal the job of a decent, hardworking American.

MARTHA STEWART: No one called me to warn me which way that chicken was going. I had a standing order at the Farmer's Market to sell my eggs when the price dropped to a certain level. No little bird gave me any insider information.

DR SEUSS: Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes, the chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed I've not been told.

ERNEST HEMINGWAY: To die in the rain, alone.

JERRY FALWELL: Because the chicken was gay! Can't you people see the plain truth? That's why they call it the other side. Yes, my friends, that chicken is gay. And if you eat that chicken, you will become gay too. I say we boycott all chickens until we sort out this abomination that the liberal media whitewashes with seemingly harmless phrases like the other side. That chicken should not be crossing the road. It's as plain and as simple as that.

GRANDPA: In my day we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Somebody told us the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough.

BARBARA WALTERS: Isn't that interesting? In a few moments, we will be listening to the chicken tell, for the first time, the heartwarming story of how it experienced a serious case of molting, and went on to accomplish its lifelong dream of crossing the road.

ARISTOTLE: It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.

JOHN LENNON: Imagine all the chickens in the world crossing roads together, in peace.

BILL GATES: I have just released eChicken2008, which will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your checkbook. Internet Explorer is an integral part of eChicken2008. This new platform is much more stable and will never crash.

ALBERT EINSTEIN: Did the chicken really cross the road, or did the road move beneath the chicken?

COLONEL SANDERS: Did I miss one? Damn.

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Community Comments  Post Comment

 
View Profile for konifurkonifur
Posted on Oct 13, 2008 at 08:57 AM
26,616 tokens, 1.6 months wasted
Q...why did konifur cross the road ?

A... He still had his dick stuck up the chickens ass.

hey! it wasn`t me!

forgive me i am discombobulated again.

i would not like be a member of a club who would have me as a member...Groucho
Marks.

T.U.R.D. (because I'm a farter)



 
View Profile for AppleAnnieAppleAnnie
Posted on Oct 13, 2008 at 10:35 PM
1,204 tokens, 5.21 days wasted
Comment in reply to konifur's original comment

ROFLMAO
Congratulations You finally found something small enough to stick your wee winky in.

Life's a bitch and then you die, so sit down, shut up, hang on and enjoy the
ride.
=^_^=

 
View Profile for konifurkonifur
Posted on Oct 13, 2008 at 11:27 PM
26,616 tokens, 1.6 months wasted
Comment in reply to AppleAnnie's original comment

well thank you. Little-Bok and myself have a tremendous relationship,she does her thing flapping around the yard with her chums and i go out on the town with the lads, but i always go back to Little-Bok,sex is wonderful and i would never leave her..................well i do need the eggs.

(This comment was modified on Oct 13, 2008 11:28 PM)

hey! it wasn`t me!

forgive me i am discombobulated again.

i would not like be a member of a club who would have me as a member...Groucho
Marks.

T.U.R.D. (because I'm a farter)



 
View Profile for DebzPageDebzPage
Posted on Oct 23, 2008 at 09:49 PM
5,270 tokens, 1.83 weeks wasted
Comment in reply to konifur's original comment

Konifur... ya boss called... "You're fired"


The following image was attached:

I keep pressing 'Escape' But I'm still here....
A Proud V Double B
T.U.R.D. Madame President
N.S.B.A.P.O.I. South Pacific Member
and competent 'Fat Knacker Dancer'

 
View Profile for konifurkonifur
Posted on Oct 23, 2008 at 11:57 PM
26,616 tokens, 1.6 months wasted
Comment in reply to DebzPage's original comment



but debz i never ever fisted poor little bok.

but ok that`s fair, i did test a few before i met a real live one.

hey! it wasn`t me!

forgive me i am discombobulated again.

i would not like be a member of a club who would have me as a member...Groucho
Marks.

T.U.R.D. (because I'm a farter)



 
View Profile for DebzPageDebzPage
Posted on Oct 24, 2008 at 05:52 AM
5,270 tokens, 1.83 weeks wasted
Comment in reply to konifur's original comment

oh dont tell me that! Just thinking about it makes my body hurt bad!

I keep pressing 'Escape' But I'm still here....
A Proud V Double B
T.U.R.D. Madame President
N.S.B.A.P.O.I. South Pacific Member
and competent 'Fat Knacker Dancer'

 
View Profile for HeywoodHeywood
Posted on Oct 16, 2008 at 01:38 PM
797 tokens, 4.28 days wasted
Comment in reply to konifur's original comment

Funny! Reminds me of my favorite comeback line.

Them: "Fuck you!"
Me: "You'd never go back to chickens!"
Them: Stunned silence while they try to think of a clever retort. They never do.

I can resist anything except temptation. Oscar Wilde

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