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Body Facts
51 comments | Posted by DebzPage 15 months ago

Konifur Goes To The Job Centre

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For Tom & Betty

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1: The largest cell in the human body is the female egg and the smallest is the male sperm.

2: A full bladder is roughly the size of a soft ball.

3: It takes food seven seconds to get from your mouth to your stomach.

4: One human hair can support 3 kg (6 lb)

5: Human thighbones are stronger than concrete.

6: The attachment of human muscles to skin is what causes dimples.

7: The average man's penis is three times the length of his thumb.

8: A woman's heart beats faster than a man's.

9: If the average male never shaved, his beard would be 13 feet long when he died.

10: Men with hairless chests are more likely to get cirrhosis of the liver than men with hair.

11: There are about one trillion bacteria on each of your feet.

12: Side by side, 2000 cells from the human body could cover about one square inch.

13: Women blink twice as often as men.

14: The average person's skin weighs twice as much as the brain.

15: When you are looking at someone you love, your pupils dilate. .. . .they do the same when you are looking at someone you hate!

16: Your ears secrete more earwax when you are afraid than when you aren't.

17: Your body uses 300 muscles to balance itself when you are standing still.

18: If saliva cannot dissolve something, you cannot taste it.

19: The average woman is five inches shorter than the average man.

Still looking at your's, or his thumb, aren't you ?

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DebzPage
Posted on Oct 09, 2008 at 08:33 PM
5,270 tokens, 1.83 weeks wasted

Will someone tell me if number 7 is true... I hope not, it would be in my warped nature to be looking at men's thumbs, and I don't need a new affliction

Nah please don't tell me....Bugga wish I hadn't posted this blog now

The following image was attached:

I keep pressing 'Escape' But I'm still here....
A Proud V Double B
T.U.R.D. Madame President
N.S.B.A.P.O.I. South Pacific Member
and competent 'Fat Knacker Dancer'

Reply | Post New

AppleAnnie
Posted on Oct 09, 2008 at 11:41 PM
1,204 tokens, 5.21 days wasted

Comment in reply to DebzPage's original comment

guess we will have to have the guys measure their thumbs and post the measurement. lol.. bet they are too chicken

Life's a bitch and then you die, so sit down, shut up, hang on and enjoy the
ride.
=^_^=

Reply | Post New

konifur
Posted on Oct 10, 2008 at 12:41 AM
26,616 tokens, 1.6 months wasted

Comment in reply to AppleAnnie's original comment

is that the length or width muhahahaha.

hey! it wasn`t me!

forgive me i am discombobulated again.

i would not like be a member of a club who would have me as a member...Groucho
Marks.

T.U.R.D. (because I'm a farter)

Reply | Post New

DebzPage
Posted on Oct 10, 2008 at 02:24 AM
5,270 tokens, 1.83 weeks wasted

Comment in reply to konifur's original comment

Oh Konifur... you cant make money that way...

The following image was attached:

I keep pressing 'Escape' But I'm still here....
A Proud V Double B
T.U.R.D. Madame President
N.S.B.A.P.O.I. South Pacific Member
and competent 'Fat Knacker Dancer'

Reply | Post New

DebzPage
Posted on Oct 10, 2008 at 01:59 AM
5,270 tokens, 1.83 weeks wasted

Comment in reply to AppleAnnie's original comment

No Annie we need their partners to tell us... we all know what liar's our boys are when it comes to Wee Willy

The following image was attached:

I keep pressing 'Escape' But I'm still here....
A Proud V Double B
T.U.R.D. Madame President
N.S.B.A.P.O.I. South Pacific Member
and competent 'Fat Knacker Dancer'

Reply | Post New

konifur
Posted on Oct 10, 2008 at 04:13 AM
26,616 tokens, 1.6 months wasted

Comment in reply to DebzPage's original comment

you owe anne a new pair of knickers as she just pissed hers laughing at that.nice one debz.
you deserve this award for that one.

The following image was attached:

hey! it wasn`t me!

forgive me i am discombobulated again.

i would not like be a member of a club who would have me as a member...Groucho
Marks.

T.U.R.D. (because I'm a farter)

Reply | Post New

AppleAnnie
Posted on Oct 10, 2008 at 09:32 AM
1,204 tokens, 5.21 days wasted

Comment in reply to konifur's original comment

LOL you know me well.
Don't worry. I do not go onto Ugoto any more without a garbage bag covered by a big towel under me to protect my chair. Got tired of constantly changing pants

Life's a bitch and then you die, so sit down, shut up, hang on and enjoy the
ride.
=^_^=

Reply | Post New

konifur
Posted on Oct 11, 2008 at 12:42 AM
26,616 tokens, 1.6 months wasted

Comment in reply to AppleAnnie's original comment

so you pee your pants as well....i was talking about my wife "Anne." so we have two pissy knickers to deal with.

hey! it wasn`t me!

forgive me i am discombobulated again.

i would not like be a member of a club who would have me as a member...Groucho
Marks.

T.U.R.D. (because I'm a farter)

Reply | Post New

sweetbirdy
Posted on Oct 16, 2008 at 12:23 PM
8,708 tokens, 3.55 weeks wasted

Comment in reply to AppleAnnie's original comment

What are you doing WEARING PANTS??????? HMM???
You know the rules here. #1 RULE IS?? What?? I can't hear you!! number one RULE is NO PANTIES SHORTS BOXERS BREIF'S NADA!!!!!! Tsk Tsk Tsk!!
You know the punishment,,,,Go,,, Straight to Konifurs room, do not pass go, Do not collect $200.00... Shame on you !! Never admit shit!!!
Sheeshhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!

I would never do crack... I would never do a drug named after a part of my own
ass, okay?
Denis Leary

'Life is like riding a bicycle. To keep your balance you must keep moving.' ~
Einstein

Reply | Post New

AppleAnnie
Posted on Oct 16, 2008 at 01:30 PM
1,204 tokens, 5.21 days wasted

Comment in reply to sweetbirdy's original comment

I don't wear panties under my clothes. Konifer has either stretched them all out, left skid marks on them or plain stollen them.

Life's a bitch and then you die, so sit down, shut up, hang on and enjoy the
ride.
=^_^=

Reply | Post New

konifur
Posted on Oct 17, 2008 at 12:51 AM
26,616 tokens, 1.6 months wasted

Comment in reply to AppleAnnie's original comment

oh i`m so sorry for stealing your panties.(i don`t really steal them,i just borrow them, i do mean to give them all back.)it`s this obsession i have.sweets is giving me weekly therapy in the Jacuzzi,so i will be cured soon.
so once again please except my apologies.
here are your panties back.

also please accept a few dollars to cover the cleaning.

(This comment was modified on Oct 17, 2008 12:54 AM)

The following image was attached:

hey! it wasn`t me!

forgive me i am discombobulated again.

i would not like be a member of a club who would have me as a member...Groucho
Marks.

T.U.R.D. (because I'm a farter)

Reply | Post New

DebzPage
Posted on Oct 12, 2008 at 04:13 AM
5,270 tokens, 1.83 weeks wasted

Comment in reply to konifur's original comment

Thankyou very much for the award.... you could win a baby show cutie

I keep pressing 'Escape' But I'm still here....
A Proud V Double B
T.U.R.D. Madame President
N.S.B.A.P.O.I. South Pacific Member
and competent 'Fat Knacker Dancer'

Reply | Post New

konifur
Posted on Oct 10, 2008 at 12:28 AM
26,616 tokens, 1.6 months wasted

Comment in reply to DebzPage's original comment

i will still get back to you on that one...there is a terrible draft coming from somewhere,
here i go again on my own......

hey! it wasn`t me!

forgive me i am discombobulated again.

i would not like be a member of a club who would have me as a member...Groucho
Marks.

T.U.R.D. (because I'm a farter)

Reply | Post New

DebzPage
Posted on Oct 10, 2008 at 02:45 AM
5,270 tokens, 1.83 weeks wasted

Comment in reply to konifur's original comment

I'm sending in a couple of Judges to determine the truth Konifur

The following image was attached:

I keep pressing 'Escape' But I'm still here....
A Proud V Double B
T.U.R.D. Madame President
N.S.B.A.P.O.I. South Pacific Member
and competent 'Fat Knacker Dancer'

Reply | Post New

konifur
Posted on Oct 10, 2008 at 04:10 AM
26,616 tokens, 1.6 months wasted

Comment in reply to DebzPage's original comment

yep that`s about right, they are exaggerating a bit but i think they are just being kind.

hey! it wasn`t me!

forgive me i am discombobulated again.

i would not like be a member of a club who would have me as a member...Groucho
Marks.

T.U.R.D. (because I'm a farter)

Reply | Post New

DebzPage
Posted on Oct 12, 2008 at 03:54 AM
5,270 tokens, 1.83 weeks wasted

Comment in reply to konifur's original comment

Konifur they said you had no thumbs.... is that correct???? so what are you measuring it with????

(This comment was modified on Oct 12, 2008 04:13 AM)

I keep pressing 'Escape' But I'm still here....
A Proud V Double B
T.U.R.D. Madame President
N.S.B.A.P.O.I. South Pacific Member
and competent 'Fat Knacker Dancer'

Reply | Post New

konifur
Posted on Oct 12, 2008 at 08:09 AM
26,616 tokens, 1.6 months wasted

Comment in reply to DebzPage's original comment

anne has thumbs and very small ones at that.

hey! it wasn`t me!

forgive me i am discombobulated again.

i would not like be a member of a club who would have me as a member...Groucho
Marks.

T.U.R.D. (because I'm a farter)

Reply | Post New

DebzPage
Posted on Oct 12, 2008 at 08:25 AM
5,270 tokens, 1.83 weeks wasted

Comment in reply to konifur's original comment

LOL poor Baby,

The following image was attached:

I keep pressing 'Escape' But I'm still here....
A Proud V Double B
T.U.R.D. Madame President
N.S.B.A.P.O.I. South Pacific Member
and competent 'Fat Knacker Dancer'

Reply | Post New

konifur
Posted on Oct 12, 2008 at 08:36 AM
26,616 tokens, 1.6 months wasted

Comment in reply to DebzPage's original comment

uu-nnnnnnnnnnnnn. tee hee... i went poop poop in my diaper.

hey! it wasn`t me!

forgive me i am discombobulated again.

i would not like be a member of a club who would have me as a member...Groucho
Marks.

T.U.R.D. (because I'm a farter)

Reply | Post New

DebzPage
Posted on Oct 12, 2008 at 08:53 AM
5,270 tokens, 1.83 weeks wasted

Comment in reply to konifur's original comment

Ewaaa that was only changed 20mins ago... you will have to stay in it for and hour or so I am busy

I keep pressing 'Escape' But I'm still here....
A Proud V Double B
T.U.R.D. Madame President
N.S.B.A.P.O.I. South Pacific Member
and competent 'Fat Knacker Dancer'

Reply | Post New

konifur
Posted on Oct 12, 2008 at 08:55 AM
26,616 tokens, 1.6 months wasted

Comment in reply to DebzPage's original comment

tee hee *squelch squelch,parrrrrrrrrrrp* oops sorry,tee hee!

hey! it wasn`t me!

forgive me i am discombobulated again.

i would not like be a member of a club who would have me as a member...Groucho
Marks.

T.U.R.D. (because I'm a farter)

Reply | Post New

sweetbirdy
Posted on Oct 16, 2008 at 12:26 PM
8,708 tokens, 3.55 weeks wasted

Comment in reply to DebzPage's original comment

I think someone should tell Annie he needs a diaper rash cream his left thigh looks a little raw!!

I would never do crack... I would never do a drug named after a part of my own
ass, okay?
Denis Leary

'Life is like riding a bicycle. To keep your balance you must keep moving.' ~
Einstein

Reply | Post New

DebzPage
Posted on Oct 19, 2008 at 04:32 AM
5,270 tokens, 1.83 weeks wasted

Comment in reply to sweetbirdy's original comment

Oh that... nah it was from the last time I spanked himHe's a naughty wee fella

I keep pressing 'Escape' But I'm still here....
A Proud V Double B
T.U.R.D. Madame President
N.S.B.A.P.O.I. South Pacific Member
and competent 'Fat Knacker Dancer'

Reply | Post New

Bamber
Posted on Oct 10, 2008 at 12:33 AM
13,293 tokens, 1.93 months wasted

Comment in reply to DebzPage's original comment

I'm obviously not 'average' then.

Usquequaque in fimus, tantum sublimitas varius.

Youth passes, but with luck immaturity can last a lifetime.

Reply | Post New

DebzPage
Posted on Oct 10, 2008 at 01:44 AM
5,270 tokens, 1.83 weeks wasted

Comment in reply to Bamber's original comment

Bamber, I am sure that Wizards must be above the national average... is levitation not one of your specialities?????

The following image was attached:

I keep pressing 'Escape' But I'm still here....
A Proud V Double B
T.U.R.D. Madame President
N.S.B.A.P.O.I. South Pacific Member
and competent 'Fat Knacker Dancer'

Reply | Post New

capttomguam
Posted on Oct 10, 2008 at 01:42 AM
3,273 tokens, 2.38 weeks wasted

Comment in reply to DebzPage's original comment

Kinda depends on who,where,temperature and her "input"!

Capt. TOM
"CARPE DIEM"

Reply | Post New

DebzPage
Posted on Oct 10, 2008 at 02:50 AM
5,270 tokens, 1.83 weeks wasted

Comment in reply to capttomguam's original comment

I am sure there is plenty to help Bamber 'levitate' I hear they have a pool table at his favorite boozer

The following image was attached:

I keep pressing 'Escape' But I'm still here....
A Proud V Double B
T.U.R.D. Madame President
N.S.B.A.P.O.I. South Pacific Member
and competent 'Fat Knacker Dancer'

Reply | Post New

Bamber
Posted on Oct 10, 2008 at 03:46 AM
13,293 tokens, 1.93 months wasted

Comment in reply to DebzPage's original comment

Actually, in my local we have the only Bar Billiards table for miles around.

The following image was attached:

Usquequaque in fimus, tantum sublimitas varius.

Youth passes, but with luck immaturity can last a lifetime.

Reply | Post New

konifur
Posted on Oct 11, 2008 at 01:28 AM
26,616 tokens, 1.6 months wasted

Comment in reply to Bamber's original comment

have not seen one of them since the 70`s.

hey! it wasn`t me!

forgive me i am discombobulated again.

i would not like be a member of a club who would have me as a member...Groucho
Marks.

T.U.R.D. (because I'm a farter)

Reply | Post New

DebzPage
Posted on Oct 12, 2008 at 03:37 AM
5,270 tokens, 1.83 weeks wasted

Comment in reply to Bamber's original comment

Bamber please tell me that you noticed the pretty bottom that I posted you and not just the pool table... I would hate to think that you had lost interest in the female formPlease someone shoot me if I ever not notice a cute fella over a pool table

I keep pressing 'Escape' But I'm still here....
A Proud V Double B
T.U.R.D. Madame President
N.S.B.A.P.O.I. South Pacific Member
and competent 'Fat Knacker Dancer'

Reply | Post New

AppleAnnie
Posted on Oct 10, 2008 at 09:34 AM
1,204 tokens, 5.21 days wasted

Comment in reply to DebzPage's original comment

looks like me playing pool. lol It is so easy to distract the guys

Life's a bitch and then you die, so sit down, shut up, hang on and enjoy the
ride.
=^_^=

Reply | Post New

DebzPage
Posted on Oct 12, 2008 at 04:30 AM
5,270 tokens, 1.83 weeks wasted

Comment in reply to AppleAnnie's original comment

It sure is Honey

The following image was attached:

I keep pressing 'Escape' But I'm still here....
A Proud V Double B
T.U.R.D. Madame President
N.S.B.A.P.O.I. South Pacific Member
and competent 'Fat Knacker Dancer'

Reply | Post New

sweetbirdy
Posted on Oct 15, 2008 at 06:42 PM
8,708 tokens, 3.55 weeks wasted

Comment in reply to DebzPage's original comment

Yes my dear sister tis true..I experimented with the hubby,,He passed with flying colours...

I would never do crack... I would never do a drug named after a part of my own
ass, okay?
Denis Leary

'Life is like riding a bicycle. To keep your balance you must keep moving.' ~
Einstein

Reply | Post New

DebzPage
Posted on Oct 15, 2008 at 07:59 PM
5,270 tokens, 1.83 weeks wasted

Comment in reply to sweetbirdy's original comment

Lucky Girl... as long as it's a thick thumb too

I keep pressing 'Escape' But I'm still here....
A Proud V Double B
T.U.R.D. Madame President
N.S.B.A.P.O.I. South Pacific Member
and competent 'Fat Knacker Dancer'

Reply | Post New

DebzPage
Posted on Oct 15, 2008 at 08:11 PM
5,270 tokens, 1.83 weeks wasted

Comment in reply to DebzPage's original comment

Stupid me... forgot the picture

The following image was attached:

I keep pressing 'Escape' But I'm still here....
A Proud V Double B
T.U.R.D. Madame President
N.S.B.A.P.O.I. South Pacific Member
and competent 'Fat Knacker Dancer'

Reply | Post New

metalhed4200
Posted on Oct 10, 2008 at 12:16 AM
1,218 tokens, 1.08 weeks wasted

#5 is only true for vertical strength. It actually can support more weight than steal but on it's side it is really quite brittle.

Also I don't believe number 4. I'm a long haired dude and i tried tying a hair around my cell phone which does not weigh anywhere near 6 pounds and it broke right away.

No signature.

Reply | Post New

Bamber
Posted on Oct 10, 2008 at 12:31 AM
13,293 tokens, 1.93 months wasted

Comment in reply to metalhed4200's original comment

#4 says one human hair - but does not define which one.
You obviously selected the wrong one.

(This comment was modified on Oct 10, 2008 12:31 AM)

Usquequaque in fimus, tantum sublimitas varius.

Youth passes, but with luck immaturity can last a lifetime.

Reply | Post New

capttomguam
Posted on Oct 10, 2008 at 01:37 AM
3,273 tokens, 2.38 weeks wasted

Comment in reply to Bamber's original comment

Bamber ...You beat me to it.....Damn! BTW I only got about 2 Lbs.....but a lot of streatch from my (former) publics....gotta wait for my other "Beard" to grow out.

Capt. TOM
"CARPE DIEM"

Reply | Post New

AppleAnnie
Posted on Oct 10, 2008 at 09:35 AM
1,204 tokens, 5.21 days wasted

Comment in reply to capttomguam's original comment

TMI TMI

Life's a bitch and then you die, so sit down, shut up, hang on and enjoy the
ride.
=^_^=

Reply | Post New

capttomguam
Posted on Oct 10, 2008 at 10:15 AM
3,273 tokens, 2.38 weeks wasted

Comment in reply to AppleAnnie's original comment

K.M.A.! K.M.A.!
What's in your wallet?

Capt. TOM
"CARPE DIEM"

Reply | Post New

AppleAnnie
Posted on Oct 10, 2008 at 10:39 AM
1,204 tokens, 5.21 days wasted

Comment in reply to capttomguam's original comment

Can't ROFLMAO points and laughs...tee hee hee... it is as bald as a billiard ball...snicker

Life's a bitch and then you die, so sit down, shut up, hang on and enjoy the
ride.
=^_^=

Reply | Post New

capttomguam
Posted on Oct 10, 2008 at 11:35 AM
3,273 tokens, 2.38 weeks wasted

Comment in reply to AppleAnnie's original comment

"Ain't we a pair; Raggedy Ann and Andy"........
Tina Turner to Mell Gibson in "Road Warrior"

Capt. TOM
"CARPE DIEM"

Reply | Post New

AppleAnnie
Posted on Oct 10, 2008 at 02:00 PM
1,204 tokens, 5.21 days wasted

Comment in reply to capttomguam's original comment

lol. I can't wait for you to get to Hawaii and I can go see you and meet Betty

Life's a bitch and then you die, so sit down, shut up, hang on and enjoy the
ride.
=^_^=

Reply | Post New

sweetbirdy
Posted on Oct 15, 2008 at 06:45 PM
8,708 tokens, 3.55 weeks wasted

.20 The strongest muscle in your body is your tounge!!! It can do a lot of damage!!

I would never do crack... I would never do a drug named after a part of my own
ass, okay?
Denis Leary

'Life is like riding a bicycle. To keep your balance you must keep moving.' ~
Einstein

Reply | Post New

DebzPage
Posted on Oct 15, 2008 at 09:32 PM
5,270 tokens, 1.83 weeks wasted

Comment in reply to sweetbirdy's original comment

Yup my tongue is very strong

The following image was attached:

I keep pressing 'Escape' But I'm still here....
A Proud V Double B
T.U.R.D. Madame President
N.S.B.A.P.O.I. South Pacific Member
and competent 'Fat Knacker Dancer'

Reply | Post New

konifur
Posted on Oct 16, 2008 at 12:24 AM
26,616 tokens, 1.6 months wasted

Comment in reply to sweetbirdy's original comment

that`s the one that never stops working, eh sweets.

another good use for duct tape right lads.

hey! it wasn`t me!

forgive me i am discombobulated again.

i would not like be a member of a club who would have me as a member...Groucho
Marks.

T.U.R.D. (because I'm a farter)

Reply | Post New

sweetbirdy
Posted on Oct 16, 2008 at 04:02 AM
8,708 tokens, 3.55 weeks wasted

Comment in reply to konifur's original comment

Your on a roll eh??? You think duck tape is good for that? Well I know a couple of more tricks that tape can be good for on men!! bad boy Steve,,, Will you never learn??

I would never do crack... I would never do a drug named after a part of my own
ass, okay?
Denis Leary

'Life is like riding a bicycle. To keep your balance you must keep moving.' ~
Einstein

Reply | Post New

konifur
Posted on Oct 16, 2008 at 04:11 AM
26,616 tokens, 1.6 months wasted

Comment in reply to sweetbirdy's original comment

* GULPS...walks slowly backwards whistling nervously, out of thread.*

hey! it wasn`t me!

forgive me i am discombobulated again.

i would not like be a member of a club who would have me as a member...Groucho
Marks.

T.U.R.D. (because I'm a farter)

Reply | Post New

konifur
Posted on Oct 16, 2008 at 04:36 AM
26,616 tokens, 1.6 months wasted

just before i sneak away from thread.......

The following image was attached:

hey! it wasn`t me!

forgive me i am discombobulated again.

i would not like be a member of a club who would have me as a member...Groucho
Marks.

T.U.R.D. (because I'm a farter)

Reply | Post New

sweetbirdy
Posted on Oct 16, 2008 at 12:14 PM
8,708 tokens, 3.55 weeks wasted

Comment in reply to konifur's original comment

Come on Konifur I want to talk to you privately,,
Why you pulling away?? Come on dear I just want to talk to you,,,ya know discuss this muscle thing,,,,, come on Konifur don't fight it!!

The following image was attached:

I would never do crack... I would never do a drug named after a part of my own
ass, okay?
Denis Leary

'Life is like riding a bicycle. To keep your balance you must keep moving.' ~
Einstein

Reply | Post New

konifur
Posted on Oct 16, 2008 at 11:55 PM
26,616 tokens, 1.6 months wasted

Comment in reply to sweetbirdy's original comment

gone.

*wind blows through the thread*

hey! it wasn`t me!

forgive me i am discombobulated again.

i would not like be a member of a club who would have me as a member...Groucho
Marks.

T.U.R.D. (because I'm a farter)

Reply | Post New

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