For The Coffee Addicts... 7 comments | Posted by Bamber 21 months ago

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You know you are addicted to coffee if:

-You grind your coffee beans in your mouth.

-You sleep with your eyes open.

-You have to watch videos in fast-forward.

-The only time you're standing still is during an earthquake.

-You can take a picture of yourself from ten feet away without using the timer.

-You've worn out your third pair of tennis shoes this week.

-Your eyes stay open when you sneeze.

-You chew on other people's fingernails.

-The nurse needs a scientific calculator to take your pulse.

-You're so jittery that people use your hands to blend their margaritas.

-You can type sixty words per minute with your feet.

-You can jump-start your car without cables.

-You don't sweat, you percolate.

-You walk twenty miles on your treadmill before you realize it's not plugged in.

-You forget to unwrap candy bars before eating them.

-You've built a miniature city out of little plastic stirrers.

-People get dizzy just watching you.

-Instant coffee takes too long.

-You channel surf faster without a remote.

-You have a picture of your coffee mug on your coffee mug.

-You can outlast the Energizer bunny.

-You short out motion detectors.

-You don't even wait for the water to boil anymore.

-Your nervous twitch registers on the Richter scale.

-You help your dog chase its tail.

-You soak your dentures in coffee overnight.

-Your first-aid kit contains two pints of coffee with an I.V. hookup.

-You ski uphill.

-You get a speeding ticket even when you're parked.

-You answer the door before people knock.

-You haven't blinked since the last lunar eclipse.

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Community Comments  Post Comment

DebzPage Posted on Apr 04, 2008 at 02:36 AM 5,270 tokens, 1.83 weeks wasted

OMG I am addicted!!!! I counted at least 5 of those as to be true in my life.... those are the ones that I admit to...

I keep pressing 'Escape' But I'm still here....
A Proud V Double B
T.U.R.D. Madame President
N.S.B.A.P.O.I. South Pacific Member
and competent 'Fat Knacker Dancer'

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Bamber Posted on Apr 04, 2008 at 02:37 AM 13,293 tokens, 1.93 months wasted

Comment in reply to DebzPage's original comment

Following recent comments I posted this especially for you.

Usquequaque in fimus, tantum sublimitas varius.

Youth passes, but with luck immaturity can last a lifetime.

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DebzPage Posted on Apr 04, 2008 at 10:43 PM 5,270 tokens, 1.83 weeks wasted

Comment in reply to Bamber's original comment

Thanks Bamber... I like/love Coffee... I find it a good idea to stay at just 4 very large cups a day or I become psycho queen and fall off the edge... but it is yummy stuff

I keep pressing 'Escape' But I'm still here....
A Proud V Double B
T.U.R.D. Madame President
N.S.B.A.P.O.I. South Pacific Member
and competent 'Fat Knacker Dancer'

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sweetbirdy Posted on Apr 04, 2008 at 02:43 AM 8,708 tokens, 3.55 weeks wasted

@-Instant coffee takes too long.

-You channel surf faster without a remote.

-You have a picture of your coffee mug on your coffee mug.

-You can outlast the Energizer bunny.

-You short out motion detectors

I would never do crack... I would never do a drug named after a part of my own
ass, okay?
Denis Leary

'Life is like riding a bicycle. To keep your balance you must keep moving.' ~
Einstein

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konifur Posted on Apr 04, 2008 at 09:08 AM 26,616 tokens, 1.6 months wasted

you only last 10 seconds, shagging.

hey! it wasn`t me!

forgive me i am discombobulated again.

i would not like be a member of a club who would have me as a member...Groucho
Marks.

T.U.R.D. (because I'm a farter)

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Bamber Posted on Apr 04, 2008 at 09:11 AM 13,293 tokens, 1.93 months wasted

Comment in reply to konifur's original comment

... but get in about 400 strokes in that time.

(This comment was modified on Apr 04, 2008 09:11 AM)

Usquequaque in fimus, tantum sublimitas varius.

Youth passes, but with luck immaturity can last a lifetime.

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DebzPage Posted on Apr 04, 2008 at 10:43 PM 5,270 tokens, 1.83 weeks wasted

Comment in reply to Bamber's original comment

Yeah baby

I keep pressing 'Escape' But I'm still here....
A Proud V Double B
T.U.R.D. Madame President
N.S.B.A.P.O.I. South Pacific Member
and competent 'Fat Knacker Dancer'

Reply | Post New

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