Computers make very fast, very accurate, mistakes.
Computers are not intelligent. They only think they are.
My software never has bugs. It just develops random features.
The definition of an Upgrade: Take old bugs out, put new ones in.
As a computer, I find your faith in technology amusing.
Does fuzzy logic tickle?
A computers attention span is as long as its power cord.
Windows: Just another pane in the glass.
SENILE.COM found... Out Of Memory...
Who is General Failure, and why is he reading my disk?
Ultimate office automation: Networked coffee.
RAM disk is not an installation procedure.
All computers wait at the same speed.
DEFINITION: Computer - a device designed to speed and automate errors.
Smash forehead on keyboard to continue.
Enter any 11-digit prime number to continue.
Error: Keyboard not attached. Press Fl to continue.
Press any key - no, no, no, NOT THAT ONE!
Press any key to continue or any other key to quit.
Read my chips: No new upgrades!
Hit any user to continue.
I hit the CTRL key but I’m still not in control!
Disk Full - Press Fl to belch.
If debugging is the process of removing bugs, then programming must be the process of putting them in.
Programmer: a red-eyed, mumbling mammal capable of conversing with inanimate objects.
Real programmers don’t document.
If it was hard to write, it should be hard to understand.
Beware of programmers who carry screwdrivers.
Relax, its only ONES and ZEROS!
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ass, okay?
Denis Leary
'Life is like riding a bicycle. To keep your balance you must keep moving.' ~
Einstein