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FROM KIWI!
An Englishman, a Scotsman and an Irishman were without tickets for the
opening ceremonies of the Olympics but hoped to be able to talk their
way in at the gate. Security was very tight, however, and each of
their attempts was met with a stern refusal.
While wandering around outside the stadium, the Englishman came upon
construction site, which gave him an idea. Grabbing a length of
scaffolding, he presented himself at the gate and said, "Johnson, the
pole vault," and was admitted.
The Scotsman, overhearing this, went at once to search the site. When
he came up with a sledge hammer, he presented himself at the gate and
said, "McTavish, the hammer." He was also admitted.
The Irishman combed the site for an hour and was nearly ready to give
up when he spotted his ticket in. Seizing a roll of barbed wire, he
presented himself at the gate and announced, "O'Sullivan, fencing."
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Watching professional fishing on TV is just watching a bunch of master baiters
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