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If Men Wrote Advice Columns
11 comments | Posted by videophotog 43 months ago
Asking The Right Question?
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Q: My husband wants to have a threesome with me and my best friend.

A: Obviously your husband cannot get enough of you! Knowing that there is only one of you he can only settle for the next best thing your best friend. Far from being an issue, this can bring you closer together. Why not get some of your old college roommates involved too? If you are still apprehensive, maybe you should let him be with your friends without you. If you're still not sure then just perform oral sex on him and cook him a nice meal while you think about it.

Q: My husband continually asks me to perform oral sex on him.

A: Do it. Semen can help you lose weight and gives a great glow to your skin. Interestingly, men know this. His offer to allow you to perform oral sex on him is totally selfless. This shows he loves you. The best thing to do is to thank him by performing it twice a day; then cook him a nice meal.

Q: My husband has too many nights out with the boys

A: This is perfectly natural behavior and it should be encouraged. The Man is a hunter and he needs to prove his prowess with other men. A night out chasing young single girls is a great stress relief and can foster a more peaceful and relaxing home. Remember, nothing can rekindle your relationship better than the man being away for a day or two (it's a great time to clean the house, too)! Just look at how emotional and happy he is when he returns to his stable home. The best thing to do when he gets home is for you and your best friend to perform oral sex on him. Then cook him a nice meal.

Q: My husband doesn't know where my clitoris is.

A: Your clitoris is of no concern to your husband. If you must mess with it, do it in your own time or ask your best friend to help. You may wish to videotape yourself while doing this, and present it to your husband as a birthday gift. To ease your selfish guilt, perform oral sex on him and cook him a delicious meal.

Q: My husband is uninterested in foreplay.

A: You are a bad person for bringing it up and should seek sensitivity training. Foreplay to a man is very stressful and time consuming. Sex should be available to your husband on demand with no pesky requests for foreplay. What this means is that you do not love your man as much as you should; He should never have to work to get you in the mood. Stop being so selfish! Perhaps you can make it up to him by performing oral sex and cooking him a nice meal.

Q: My husband always has an orgasm then rolls over and goes to sleep without giving me one.

A: I'm not sure I understand the problem. Perhaps you've forgotten to cook him a nice meal.

~Author Unknown more than likely a man!

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View Profile for alex657684alex657684
Posted on Aug 19, 2006 at 08:21 PM
11,788 tokens, 2.64 weeks wasted
Q: My husband doesn't know where my clitoris is.


Well I'll help her out.....I know exactly where it is

Hey! Hier kommt Alex
Vorhang auf fur seine Horrorshow

 
View Profile for ExplodnationExplodnation
Posted on Aug 19, 2006 at 08:31 PM
1,697 tokens, 6.58 days wasted
Comment in reply to alex657684's original comment

hehehehehehehehehehehe......hehehehe....hehe..he

right when i found the meaning of life they changed it

www.myspace.com/107359719

 
View Profile for GatorbaitGatorbait
Posted on Aug 19, 2006 at 08:35 PM
4,255 tokens, 2.9 weeks wasted
This is one where you submit it, then run like hell, and dont wait for the female response!

I don't have to attend every argument I'm invited to.

This is an age in which one cannot find common sense without a search warrant.

 
View Profile for SarahSarah
Posted on Aug 20, 2006 at 12:25 AM
11,949 tokens, 2.26 months wasted
Comment in reply to Gatorbait's original comment



Smart man !!!

I don't hang out here much anymore...

 
View Profile for SarahSarah
Posted on Aug 20, 2006 at 12:31 AM
11,949 tokens, 2.26 months wasted
*speaks in a monotone style like a zombie*

Must perform oral sex on my man. Then cook him a nice meal.



I don't hang out here much anymore...

 
View Profile for minodudeminodude
Posted on Aug 21, 2006 at 02:37 AM
19,484 tokens, 3.85 weeks wasted
Comment in reply to Sarah's original comment

thats why everyone likes you

either that, or your boobs

Just Kidding!!

Watching professional fishing on TV is just watching a bunch of master baiters
hold their rods

Politics is just a bunch of mass debators in one room

 
View Profile for SarahSarah
Posted on Aug 21, 2006 at 02:47 AM
11,949 tokens, 2.26 months wasted
Comment in reply to minodude's original comment

OMFG !!!


I don't hang out here much anymore...

 
View Profile for Phoenix_84Phoenix_84
Posted on Aug 21, 2006 at 04:23 PM
2,201 tokens, 1.47 weeks wasted
Comment in reply to Sarah's original comment

i think sarsh finally gets the concept.

(This comment was modified on Aug 21, 2006 04:23 PM)

Do Not Meddle in the Affairs of Dragons, for You are Crunchy and Taste Good with
Ketchup

Veni, Veni, Dormivi!

Licetne mihi ambulare ad latrinam?

I do not mean to pry, but you don't by any chance happen to have six fingers
on your right hand?

 
View Profile for SarahSarah
Posted on Aug 21, 2006 at 04:24 PM
11,949 tokens, 2.26 months wasted
Comment in reply to Phoenix_84's original comment

LOL ... I think.

I don't hang out here much anymore...

 
View Profile for hotbutpsychohotbutpsycho
Posted on Aug 20, 2006 at 07:05 AM
789 tokens, 1.63 weeks wasted
subliminal messages dont give in must resist preforming oral sex and cooking nice meals must .......resist.......o i cant resist it any longer must preform oral sex and cook him nice meals

i know im sexy but damn do you have to stare??

What's the fastest way to a man's heart?
Through his chest with a sharp knife

Why is it so hard for women to find men that are sensitive, caring, and
good-looking?
Because those men already have boyfriends.

 
View Profile for MRBMRB
Posted on Aug 25, 2006 at 04:33 AM
1,252 tokens, 2.18 days wasted
wat an advise collum it would solve all our problems

this user does not have a signature

i dont suffer from insanity. i enjoy every minute of it.

Why r we dying to live if we are just living to die? (Tupac n Biggie Runnin)

dont worry to much about life no one gets out alive.

I smile because I don't know what the hell is going on


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