Harvey And Gladys 8 comments | Posted by Homefries 33 months ago

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Harvey and Glady are getting ready for bed. Glady is standing in front of her full-length mirror, taking a long, hard look at herself.

"You know, Harvey," she comments. "I stare into this mirror and I see an ancient creature. My face is all wrinkled, my boobs sag so much that they dangle to my waist, my arms and legs are as flabby as popped balloons, and...my butt looks like a sad, deflated version of the Hindenburg!" My body has just gone to hell in a hand basket!

She turns to face her husband and says, "Dear, please tell me just one positive thing about my body so I can feel better about myself."

Harvey studies Glady critically for a moment and then says in a soft, thoughtful voice, "Well, there's nothing wrong with your eyesight."

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txqtee03 Posted on Jun 23, 2006 at 10:05 AM 170 tokens, 1.22 days wasted

The next day they found Harvey dead of blunt force trauma.

"If you haven't got anything nice to say about anybody, come sit next to me."

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viktoria_ja Posted on Jun 23, 2006 at 12:15 PM 1,028 tokens, 2.9 days wasted

Comment in reply to txqtee03's original comment

he never knew what hit him didnt he :D

Nude, Tattooed, & Sweet as Hell

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alex657684 Posted on Jun 23, 2006 at 10:44 AM 11,787 tokens, 2.64 weeks wasted

well, in all fairness to him, she never specified he had to lie to her.

Hey! Hier kommt Alex
Vorhang auf fur seine Horrorshow

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bazil94 Posted on Jun 23, 2006 at 02:33 PM 126 tokens, 1.62 days wasted

Comment in reply to alex657684's original comment

yeah, but any guy with half a brain (which probably means all of us) knows you always lie when asked that question, ALWAYS!!!

I ignore what the angels say,
and enjoy a special place,
where the demons speak to me

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LooS_RC Posted on Jun 26, 2006 at 09:48 AM 481 tokens, 1.51 days wasted

Comment in reply to bazil94's original comment

but a good, lasting relationship is it not based on telling the truth???

!!!!!CARPE DIEM!!!!!
!!!!!WE ARE ALL MADE OF STARDUST!!!!!

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bazil94 Posted on Jun 26, 2006 at 01:20 PM 126 tokens, 1.62 days wasted

Comment in reply to LooS_RC's original comment

HELL NO!!! you always lie when they ask how they look, you say "honey, you look amazing" everytime, that is what you say, and if you dont there wont be a long and lasting relationship

I ignore what the angels say,
and enjoy a special place,
where the demons speak to me

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stutterfly Posted on Jun 23, 2006 at 09:34 PM 628 tokens, 1.5 days wasted

repost.......well my comment wasn't long enuf...so now it is =)

il ove cho.co.lat[e]

....../ `---____________|]
...../_==o;;;;;;;;_____.:/
.....), ---.(_(__) /
....// (..) ), ----"
...//___//
..//___//
bang bang

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junsanchez41 Posted on Jun 26, 2006 at 02:31 PM 956 tokens, 5.43 days wasted

very nice comment, but he is really telling the truth...

when you dont smoke you die, when you dont drink you die, so better smoke and
drink and die happy.

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