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9 comments | Posted by hunnybunny 34 months ago
Dinner Fun
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The following are all replies that British women have put on Child
Support Agency forms in the section for listing father's details. These are
(allegedly) genuine excerpts from the forms:

01. Regarding the identity of the father of my twins; child A was
fathered by Jim Munson. I am unsure as to the identity of the father of child
B, but I believe that he was conceived on the same night.

02. I am unsure as to the identity of the father of my child as I was
being sick out of a window when taken unexpectedly from behind. I can
provide you with a list of names of men that I think were at the party if this
helps.

03. I do not know the name of the father of my little girl. She was
conceived at a party at 3600 Grand Avenue, where I had unprotected sex
with a man I met that night. I do remember that the sex was so good that I fainted. If you do manage to track down the father can you send me his phone number? Thanks.

04. I don't know the identity of the father of my daughter. He drives
a BMW that now has a hole made by my stiletto in one of the door panels.
Perhaps you can contact BMW service stations in this area and see if he's had
it replaced.

05. I have never had sex with a man. I am awaiting a letter from the
Pope confirming that my son's conception was immaculate and that he is Christ risen again.

>06. I cannot tell you the name of child A's dad, as he informs me that
to do so would blow his cover and that would have cataclysmic implications
for the British economy. I am torn between doing right by you and right by the country. Please advise.

07. I do not know who the father of my child was as all squaddies look
thesame to me. I can confirm that he was a Royal Green Jacket.

08. Peter Smith is the father of child A. If you do catch up with him
can you ask him what he did with my AC/DC CDs?

09. From the dates it seems that my daughter was conceived at Euro
Disney maybe it really is the Magic Kingdom.

10. So much about that night is a blur. The only thing that I remember
for sure is Delia Smith did a program about eggs earlier in the evening.
If I'd have stayed in and watched more TV rather than going to the party at
146 Miller Drive, mine might have remained unfertilized.

11. I am unsure as to the identity of the father of my baby; after all
when you eat a can of beans you can't be sure which one made you fart.

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Community Comments  Post Comment

 
View Profile for Phoenix_84Phoenix_84
Posted on May 31, 2006 at 03:25 PM
2,200 tokens, 1.47 weeks wasted
seen it before. i still think the last one is hilarious.

Do Not Meddle in the Affairs of Dragons, for You are Crunchy and Taste Good with
Ketchup

Veni, Veni, Dormivi!

Licetne mihi ambulare ad latrinam?

I do not mean to pry, but you don't by any chance happen to have six fingers
on your right hand?

 
View Profile for alex657684alex657684
Posted on May 31, 2006 at 03:42 PM
11,787 tokens, 2.64 weeks wasted
10. So much about that night is a blur. The only thing that I remember for sure is Delia Smith did a program about eggs earlier in the evening. If I'd have stayed in and watched more TV rather than going to the party at 146 Miller Drive, mine might have remained unfertilized.



Good one!

Seems to be a lot of easy women there....might have to take a trip in the near future.

(This comment was modified on May 31, 2006 03:43 PM)

Hey! Hier kommt Alex
Vorhang auf fur seine Horrorshow

 
View Profile for Phoenix_84Phoenix_84
Posted on May 31, 2006 at 03:58 PM
2,200 tokens, 1.47 weeks wasted
Comment in reply to alex657684's original comment

keep in mind, Europeans, in general, are not as uptight about sex as Americans are.

Do Not Meddle in the Affairs of Dragons, for You are Crunchy and Taste Good with
Ketchup

Veni, Veni, Dormivi!

Licetne mihi ambulare ad latrinam?

I do not mean to pry, but you don't by any chance happen to have six fingers
on your right hand?

 
View Profile for Phoenix_84Phoenix_84
Posted on May 31, 2006 at 04:05 PM
2,200 tokens, 1.47 weeks wasted
Comment in reply to alex657684's original comment

double post, sorry

(This comment was modified on May 31, 2006 04:05 PM)

Do Not Meddle in the Affairs of Dragons, for You are Crunchy and Taste Good with
Ketchup

Veni, Veni, Dormivi!

Licetne mihi ambulare ad latrinam?

I do not mean to pry, but you don't by any chance happen to have six fingers
on your right hand?

 
View Profile for thewatcherthewatcher
Posted on May 31, 2006 at 05:35 PM
121 tokens, 19.12 hours wasted
"If you catch up with him ask him what he did with my AC/DC CD's"
yes your the father of my only child, but anyway,where's my AC/DC CDs?

I wonder how people invented glue? some guy burning a horse, checks its hooves
,"....Wait a minute....That could be glue!!!." his friend walks up, "what about
that one over there looks like hes out of his mind." "he'll be crazy glue."

 
View Profile for ArchArch
Posted on May 31, 2006 at 08:17 PM
2,969 tokens, 1.61 weeks wasted
06. I cannot tell you the name of child A's dad, as he informs me that
to do so would blow his cover and that would have cataclysmic implications
for the British economy. I am torn between doing right by you and right by the country. Please advise.


James Bond at it again!

Are "Toys r Us" in the ghetto called "We b Toys"?

 
View Profile for rasec1736rasec1736
Posted on Jun 01, 2006 at 01:00 AM
1,706 tokens, 3.44 days wasted
some people can be so retarded

fat chicks need love too, but they have to pay
-Quagmire
www.myspace.com/rasec17
now with my "myspace" band of the week.

 
View Profile for konifurkonifur
Posted on Jun 01, 2006 at 03:07 AM
26,096 tokens, 1.56 months wasted
this is one of the best i have read in a long time, i can believe it to be true.the girl in number 2 must of been an english girl,lol.

hey! it wasn`t me!

forgive me i am discombobulated again.

i would not like be a member of a club who would have me as a member...Groucho
Marks.

T.U.R.D. (because I'm a farter)



 
View Profile for TGI420TGI420
Posted on Jun 01, 2006 at 02:36 PM
1,163 tokens, 4.38 days wasted
lol, those are some loose women.

Be ashamed of nothing you do, do nothing you are ashamed of.

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